Weaving Gold

Mokosha, Anastasia Sophia, and Me, Natalia . . . while the books are written

Letting Humanness Be

On October, 1, 2014, a Fool stepped from the a cliff, and my journey through the tarot began. At embarkation, I though I was traveling a mere eighteen inches, from head to heart. I knew the distance was more daunting than it seemed, but still, it was a small adjustment, I convinced myself, from thinking to feeling; from analyzing to sensing; from rigidity to softness.

The guides I encountered, disappointed. The High Priestess handed me a scroll that was to reveal my the secret of my highest potential, but it burned in my hands before I could decipher its words. The Empress held up a mirror to show me that I’ve got this thing called life in hand, but I continue to feel inept. The Emperor reassured me, saying, “You are safe,” but left me the next day, just the same. The Hierophant demanded that I profess my secret knowledge, but I ended up announcing that I can teach others no thing.

In the second week of my journey, revelation! The cards revealed my passion for Adventure and exploring mysteries through writing, and they promised it would be easy. I crafted a contract between the Eternal part of me and the me that is typing. I secured ease, abundance, and flow in writing. I integrated, transformed, transmuted, and released, everything, over and over. I attempted to shake it all up, to create harmony, but I failed. I felt nothing. I did nothing. I waited.

I am waiting . . . some more . . . again. I am breaking the chains of society’s conditioning and opinions, and letting them rust and disintegrate. I am emerging from dark and formless roots, hoping that wings will unfurl and allow me to fly. I am discovering my own true nature and am determined to live in accordance with it.

I am waiting . . . some more . . . again. I am dreaming impossible, improbable dreams. And I am letting it be.

Inspired by Lyn Thruman‘s October Writing Challenge: Writing the Wisdom of the Soul. I am playing and believing, amidst continuing confusion.

Prompt for October 30: The World is the feeling of wholeness and happiness that comes when everything lines up perfectly, usually part through our own efforts and part as a gift from the Universe (for playing so nicely).

Write about the journey you’ve taken through the different tarot cards in this challenge. What did you discover about yourself? What days/cards were the easiest and what were the hardest?